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Taylors for Paper of Every Desire!

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TAYLORS FOR PAPER OF EVERY DESIRE

words & music: Mike Ford 2017

 

A conflict is raging in lower Siam...

The duchess displayed young George in his pram

The Empress of Cornwall is sailing south seas

They've just found a cure for McSmortsen's disease

There's rubber in the Amazon, gold in the west

Lord Franklin's set off on a new Arctic quest

And for this breaking news what was your one source?

You read it all written on paper of course...

 

It's the paper from Todmorden that we regale

Delivery by trans-colonial rail

Word of which is spreading wider and higher

Yes it's Taylor brothers paper for every desire......

 

Our factory sends it to our Market store

You'll never make paper from rag-ends no more

Yes the pulp of the poplar, the balsam and pine

Gives Taylor brothers paper of every design

 

Oh we've scrollers and screeds and playbills and waybills

Weeklies and dailies and papers festooned gaily.....

Gilded invitations for saucy celebrations

Coming out soirées and fisticuffsmanship

Sail regattas, sonatas, so do make the trip

To see our most impressive presses' manufacture

Paper goods for every need and every stature

 

Blessed by the crown for invention and skill

We work round the clock at our factory and mill

And the mighty Don washes away all the swill

Make your appointment today...up the river that flows to the bay

See Taylor Bros for papery...without delay!

 

Background

We are inundated with advertisements - Internet, TV, Radio, Billboards, etc.  I enjoy exploring old (and very old) newspapers and such for examples of older styles of advertising.

The Todmorden Mills site was for a long time a place of successful industry - lumber, grain processing, bricks, beer (all of which has been cleverly put into glorious song by student visitors in this project).  The greatest manufacturing era of the site was in paper production - it was only the 2nd Paper Mill in Canada, and from the early to late 1800s it produced paper products sent far and wide.  With paper so easily accessible (and cheap) today, it's hard to imagine the rarity, and luxury, of quality paper back then.

With this song, I've set out to imagine what a publicity JINGLE for Taylor's Paper Mills at Todmorden might have sounded like.  The song celebrates the product's importance, the great diversity of output from the Mills, and their customers.  I couldn't resist inserting an environmentally-directed line just before the ending.  It is quite possible that many thought it was wonderful, at the time, that the Don River not only drove the mills, but carried away the refuse.  Unfortunately, their are many today, often in positions of great wealth and power, who feel more or less the same about our waterways.   

Other Examples

Check out these other composers who have imagined Jingles for products that lined the shelves long before iPods, Fidget Spinners and PlayStations:

 

PINEAPPLE by Sparks (Bet you're hungry for some now!)

 

PIRELLI'S MIRACLE ELIXIR from Stephen Sondheim's Sweeney Todd

 

...and this clever bit by the amazing Flanders & Swann, advertising the joys and lovable aggravations of a London Double Becker Bus in:

A TRANSPORT OF DELIGHT

(Hold very tight please!)

Song Ideas